In lieu of our usual 6:15 Tuesday evening at Phoenix Park, here is your election day Queerfit workout:

Warmup. Jog around the parking lot before you go inside. Look for True the Vote “poll watchers” trained by the GOP who are trying to turn people away by asking if they have the right ID (they can’t do this) or generally just lurking around in Black precincts looking… self-righteous and white (they can do this).  If you spot one, have them read The New Yorker’s well-reported The Voter-Fraud Myth, tracing the whole made-up voter fraud crock of poo back to Hans von Spakovsky, a Republican lawyer from Georgia.

Show your ID. Here’s the Secretary of State’s list of acceptable forms of ID. If you’re transgender and the poll worker gives you shit, roll your neck and let them know the gender marker on your ID does not have to match your gender to vote. Tell the poll worker you are one of the 4,400 transgender people in Georgia the GOP-backed voter ID laws are designed to disenfranchise and you have no intention of going along with this Tea Party scheme and so they better (take off your earrings here, or loosen your tie & roll up your shirt sleeves) step aside and let you vote.  Do some squats or pushups while you’re waiting to talk to the supervisor. Everyone’s looking at you anyway, might as well give them something to look at.

Stand in line. For the duration, do three squats on the minute, every minute. The first squat is for those whose votes will be nullified because Georgia’s new voter ID laws. Despite the GOP’s bad intentions, this is not a huge number: 1,586 Georgians since 2008 have had their ballots rejected because of the ID laws.  The second squat is for Georgians who cannot vote because they are in prison or on felony probation or parole. This is a very large number:  260,000 Georgians cannot vote because of felony voting restrictions. It’s such a big number because Georgia hands out long probation sentences like Halloween candy – we have the largest probation population in the country.

The third squat is for the astounding 440,000 adult Georgia residents who cannot vote because they are not yet citizens. We tend to equate voting with citizenship, but that’s not always been the case. Voting by noncitizen residents has been permitted in one form or another in almost all the states, and a few places (Illinois’s school board elections, for example) continue to link voting rights to residency rather than citizenship. Until 1877, Georgia extended suffrage to all male citizens and those who “declared his intention to become a citizen” so long as they have lived in the state for six months and have paid their taxes.

Multiply the total minutes  in line times three to get the total number of squats.

Add up the total number of disenfranchised Georgia residents and divide by population to discover that about 10% of voting age Georgians cannot vote. What’s this mean? In 2008, Georgia voted 47% for Obama. In our winner-take-all voting system, 50% plus one vote wins all the cookies. If there was full suffrage, who would be sitting around with a pitcher of milk eating all those cookies? Us! Not them, us! Is it any wonder the conservative white peoples are  working like the dickens to keep all barriers to voting locked in place?

Vote. Here’s Atlanta’s Progressive Voter Guide by the Urban Independents, here’s the League of Women Voters opposing Amendment #1, and here are Georgia Equality’s endorsements.

Finisher. Back in the parking lot, do 80 push-ups, breaking them up as 5 sets of 10, then 8 sets of 5.  While doing push-ups, after you’ve voted, you can consider how the electoral college, “the most undemocratic way of electing a chief executive in the world,” makes your Georgia vote for Obama electorally meaningless.

Go find your friends and celebrate an Obama victory. Then shake your legs out from all those squats and get reset to protest our President’s expanded drone strikes, unprecedented use of kill lists, and 1 million deportations.

Our midweek workout will be back next week. Now go vote & get your workout on, friends!